Part 3: Services Rendered - Section II

It's fortunate that I photographed the moment of unboxing. I did not intend to publish anything at that moment. I like to document and, having been a decade in the making, this was "to me" a worthy occasion...

(Please note the contents of the package pictured above. That is exactly what I found on opening the box.)

As is plain to see, I did get something for my money, which is a greater start then some others who have also dealt with Oz. The suit and hood both came fairly powdered, but poorly wrapped. The suit itself was rolled into a ball shape and wrapped about ten times over with a single length of factory grade plastic film (the same sort that would be used in a warehouse to wrap pallets of product). The hood was wrapped into the plastic separate from the suit, within the first three outer folds.

This is a downgrade from what I have seen, and was expecting. In the aforementioned unboxing video, the suit was wrapped more proper than this. Also, that shipment contained a few extras; a business card and a letter of thanks for support. That's not much, but I'm surprised by the lack of consistency. I wondered if it was to do with my request for discretion, though I don't see why... Supposing someone ells did open my package before me, and spilled my little secret. Would the lack of a business card really improve that situation? …No, I suspect this to be Oz's usual protocal "when he's not expecting cameras"...

P R O D U C T R E V I E W

Before discussing the state and quality of the items, I wish to present a comprehensive exhibit of exactly what I received; that you, dear reader, my familiarize yourself with the items in question, as they immediately and outwardly appear.

Please observe...

Big Blowup Suit

Suit: Front

Suit: Side

Suit: Back

Suit: Front "Closed Zipper"

Suit (Inflated): Front

Suit (Inflated): Side

Suit (Inflated): Side / Back

Suit (Inflated): Top "Front"

Suit (Inflated): Top "Side"

Suit (Inside-Out): Front

Suit (Inside-Out): Side

Suit (Inside-Out): Back

Suit (Laid Out)

Suit (Laid Out): Open

Suit (Laid Out): Inside-Out

Suit (Laid Out): Top

Suit (Laid Out): Collar

Suit (Laid Out): Ankle

Suit (Laid Out): Cuff

Inflatable Hood

Hood: Front

Hood: Side

Hood: Zipper

Hood (Inflated): Front

Hood (Inflated): Side / Front

Hood (Inflated): Side

Hood (Inflated): Side / Back

Hood (Inflated): Back

Hood (Laid Out)

Hood (Laid Out): Inside Out

Hood (Laid Out): Neck

Hood (Laid Out): Breath Tube

Regarding Seam Work

There are almost no obvious flaws or mistakes visible on either item. All the seems are glued neatly, cleanly, evenly, and look good for it. There is one noticeable flaw on the outside border of the hood's right eye, in which a small amount of excess glue bled out of the seem, in between the hood's layers. This creates a noticeable divot on the outer border of the eye; a blemish on what should be a perfect cercal.

As for strength, there is limited testing I am willing to administer, for the sake of my investment. I have, at least, preformed some stress tests (tugging on the seams here and there), to affirm that nether the suit or hood are liable to simply fall apart. As mentioned, all seems are apparently glued properly; no bunching, bubbles or other rookie mistakes, besides the one instance of bleeding in the hood.

For my only legitimate test, I did as I had originally wished. I inflated the suit past it's normal size, and added two feet to the suit's waistline. I used a marked piece of string to take proper measurements and confirm the change in size. I would consider this test a valid success, as the suit was capable of noticeably over-inflating. Although, the final result may be a little underwhelming compared to the imagination of some. Incidentally, an extra 24 inches dose not add much to a suit who's natural waistline is already 9.5 feet around. Please see for yourself...

Suit: 9' 6" Waist Circumference (Normal)

Suit: 11' 6/7" Waist Circumference (Over-inflated)

Still, that's as far as I'm willing to push this particular suit. I've seen more than one example of this specific model bulging out on one side, due to over-inflation. An unfortunate tendency of the Big Blowup Suit's design. (Probably the design's only, but most notorious flaw.) Similar in principle to the "Two-balloon experiment / effect"; the Big Blowup Suit is so wide, both halves will behave as independent containers, which exchange airflow between the middle seam. Whatever side happens to be the slightest bit weaker against internal pressure will expand first and only.

Ultimately, no test I preformed is conclusive. The question of the strength of the seams "and their compacity to stretch", may only be answered by the glue which was employed, the technique by which it was applied, and the skill with which the task was executed. Gluing latex is not as simple as gluing paper. There's a special method to do it (which you may research yourself if curious), that plays a big part in the labor of constructing latex clothing. There's also the materials for construction (glue and tools), which play a part in the cost, and may vary in quality themselves. I doubt Oz has any control over what materials, tools or techniques they may administer, and I certainly don't expect much from a "team for hire". By the barrier of language, he couldn't possibly even advise them properly on construction, if he cared to right consistent flaws, however minute. In that, I'm sure lies Oz's doubt, which he reluctantly expressed in his third message to me. I think, after all testing I've conducted thus far, I now only know as well as Oz dose. The quality of the items are, at best, ready for sale to his client. They are "apparently" acceptable, so far.

Though dubious as the quality of construction may be, there is a more reassuring aspect to the seam work, which is the "type" of seams created. The most prominent form used to bind the Big Blowup Suit together is (what I would describe as), an "Under/Over" seem; in which the bottom edge of one piece of latex is glued on top of the other. This is a stronger construction method, and better craftsmanship than what I've previously enjoyed. In combination with Under/Over seams, my old eBay suit, used (what I would call), "Side by Side" seams; which glues both pieces of latex together on the same face.

Here, I've created a simple diagram to visually demonstrate the two types of seams...

The drawback of the Side by Side method is it's tendency to come undone. Excessive air pressure can peal it apart. Though, the problem is not the type of seam itself. It's not an "evil seam" altogether. The Side by Side method is aesthetically useful on inflatable suits, in places where the two connecting layers of latex are meant to lay close together. Alternatively; in areas where the two layers are not intended to separate greatly, and are not expected to bear much pressure (i.e. cuffs, ankles, zipper "depending on it's placement"). Also, a Side by Side seam CAN be as strong as an Under/Over, if glued properly. Nevertheless, it's good practice to never used Side by Side seams where the two connecting pieces of latex will spread apart, parallel to one another (i.e. front, sides, back, zipper "again, depending on it's placement"). The risk of the Side by Side seam is realized when a suit designer dose not anticipate inappropriate application and/or, when a suit maker does not perform a proper glue job. There are areas within an inflatable suit where "though not meant to happen", air may push into and accumulates, pressure spikes, then the side by side layers are suddenly stretched parallel to one another.

My eBay suit has ruptured three times. Every time this happened, a Side by Side seam was to blame (also, I think they used Elmer's to glue it together). The Side by Side seam was overused on my eBay suit "I imagine because it's easier to create than the Under/Over method "; being employed to seal the cuffs, ankles, collar and zipper on the back, in total. The collar ruptured twice. Two times, I received a blast of air to my face for over-inflating the suit. The first time, I repaired the collar as it was. The second, I converted the seam to an Under/Over. The worst rupture occurred after, on the back of the suit, next to it's zipper. The worst design flaw of my eBay suit was to place it's zipper on the back of the torso, and bind both inner and outer layers of the suit to the zipper with Side by Side seams. This equated to two huge air chambers on either side of the zipper, sealed shut with poorly glued, inappropriate seams for the entirety of their length. It works, but only so long as the zipper remains flush against the wearer's back, while the belly of the suit expands outward, in front of them.

During a particularly big inflation "emboldened by my previous repair", I reached out, took hold of the suit's big belly and pushed in on it with both hands. Because the two layers of the suit are only connected at the zipper and collar at the torso, I inadvertently pushed the suits outer layer away from my back and forced most of the air to the rear of the suit. The two layers "bound Side by Side", where stretched parallel, and the poor glue job pealed apart. The seam to the left of the zipper failed; splitting open about 12 inches in length. The pressure also created a tear in the latex at the bottom of the zipper, which traveled up from the middle of the back to the left shoulder... A major bummer "on many fronts".

Compared to that seam work which I've formerly tolerated, Oz's Chinese production team has actually managed to impress me. Though, I suspect Oz is to thank, for likely writing those seams into his design. I recall Oz describing the Big Blowup Suit on his older website; that he originally designed it "with pressure in mind ". In deed, it's durable shape does not alone reflects that. Almost every seam is reinforced. The front, back and sides are Under/Over. The collar is Under/Over. Even the cuffs and ankles are Under/Over seams, which they didn't have to be.

At 0.4 thickness, pressure would never reach those smaller areas before expanding the torso. Yet, if constructed in a thicker latex, pressure would be equal throughout the suit. Greater as well; enough to then threaten the cuff and ankle seams. Because they are bound Under/Over, I could still safely convert my inflatable suit to a pressure suit with external garments, if I wished. This is the rare instance when I have to applaud Oz and his team. Compared to what I'm used to, this is craftsmanship that dose deserve credit.

There is only one place on the Big Blowup Suit where Side by Side seams exist; the zipper. As I've mentioned, this was my biggest problem with my eBay suit. However, as I also said; "it depends on the placement ". To the rest of the suit, the legs are comparatively small, and so, unlikely to accumulate enough air to force a split. The inner pants of the suit connect to the zipper between the legs. Even if the legs should begin to over-inflate, they will expand outward because of the ridged inward zipper, which the latex is bound to, preventing expansion in that area. Moreover, the outward expansion pulls the zipper further inward and braces the seems close against the wearer's legs, additionally aiding to prevent the layers from pealing apart.

By shape, the most vulnerable area of the suit is it's crotch, because it is an inward curve. Excessive air pressure naturally wants to force an inflatable to round out (just like in a cartoon). Weather it be an animal shaped pool toy or an odd shaped latex balloon. Unfortunately (unlike a cartoon), these areas are no more stretchy than the rest of the inflatable. such inward curves become a weak spot when pressure bears down on them, trying to push the material outward, despite being already stretched to it's limit. Inflatables usually burst at an inward seam, if not properly reinforced. That is why I requested assurance from Oz that the zipper on my suit would run from ankle to ankle. If there was nothing to bind the suit's two layers between the legs, pressure would eventually push the crotch of the suit downward, towards the floor, creating a weak spot. That the zipper itself has no elasticity, it further encourages expansion to take place elsewhere within the suit.

I would reference Oz's performance in his "Exploding Inflatable Suit" video to validate my speculations...

It demonstrates that (no matter how much the suit takes on board ), air will only accumulate in the torso and outer side of the legs. Even the sleeves will take on pressure before the legs do...

Though in that example, I will admit the seam at the crotch looks at risk. That is the weakest point; where the most air accumulates along the seams on the zipper, as it is so close to the main body of expansion. That area is where the inner and outer layers of the suit are most likely to pull apart from each other. Yet there is one more countermeasure to note. While every other seam on the suit has an average width of 10 millimeters, the Side by Side seams on either side of the zipper measure at an average of 20mm wide. It appears that the inherent weakness of the Side by Side seam was anticipated. However, I'm not entirely sure if this was intentional. There are many areas where the zipper seam also dips back down to 10mm "approximately". It may only be more bleeding of the glue. Whatever the case, this may only take the seams a little longer to come apart. It does not matter how wide the seams are if they are not glued properly. The quality of which remains in question.

Regarding Material

I'm not an expert. There is no proper (careful) method I know of to evaluate the quality of latex used. Therefore, no definitive judgment I may pass. I can't wait 5 or 6 years, then report how well the suit held up. Nor will I test how far the latex can stretch (ex. how big the suit can inflate, before it explodes). I am sure though, there exists a difference between poor and quality latex. If you, dear reader, have ever compared latex balloons from manufacturers such as "Qualatex" or "Tuftex", to balloons found available in a dollar store of supermarket, then you understand as I do. Not all latex is equal. To that point, there are some immediate perceivable problems with the latex which bother me.

The most off-putting attribute was unveiled to me when I first opened the box. Both the suit and hood emitted a pungent odor, entirely uncharacteristic of latex, and certainly not as pleasant. Considering "Latex" is in the company's name, I was fairly disappointed to not be graced with that particular fragrance, but even more so to be assaulted by a strange and frankly foul stench in it's place. I could not properly describe the odor on my own, but it called to my memory, someone who experienced the exact same problem...

In the latex community, there is a gentleman by the name of "whiteout rubber"; one of my go-to guides on the subject of care, preservation and acquisition of gear. In one instance, he reviewed a suit from Latex Catfish. One of his biggest critiques was it's odor, which he claimed to resemble chocolate and described as smelling of a "chemical Kit Kat bar". Though humorous at the time, I was floored by this claim, and could not imagine the smell. It was not until I received my own suit from Squeak Latex that I understood exactly what whiteout had experienced. His description is precisely what I would use to describe the smell of my Squeak suit. It smells like a chemist's interpretation of chocolate, and that's putting it fondly.

This is not to insinuate that Oz still employs Latex Catfish as his so-called "production team". Perhaps China in general adheres to a specific method of producing latex, that products of different companies should smell so similar. Personally, I'm inclined to believe that foul odors are an inherent trait of Chinese latex. I remember that my eBay suit had a strange smell when I first got it. I once ordered a pack of balloons directly from China, and I kid you not; they all reeked of gasoline.

Regardless of why, the smell alone speaks volumes of the quality. Just for the smell alone, it's not good latex. Furthermore, that Latex Catfish and Squeak Latex's production team likely use the same quality of material, I would point to the records of Latex Catfish reviews as a model for Squeak Latex's own. What ever problems people have experienced with Latex Catfish gear regarding material, one should probably expect the same from a Squeak Latex product.

The consistency of the latex is also uncharacteristic. The outer layer of the suit is a little stiff. That's a harsh word to use for latex, but a fair one in this particular sample. To be clear; the latex dose not have as much give as it should "at it's thickness of 0.4mm". Compared to my first suit, which is of identical thickness and similar origin, the elasticity of my Big Blowup Suit is lacking. My first suit had much grater resilience, and still does, despite being past it's presumable expiration date. I realized this during my test to overinflate the suit; the outer layer was unreasonably taught by the time it had reached my appointed limit. The latex simply does not appear capable of stretching as far as it should, before it might fail.

I would attribute this characteristic to impurities in the latex. Of course, the dye used to color the latex sheeting red could easily be ascribed to that problem. However, I think the latex is still more tainted than the dye can account for, considering my older suit is also of an unnatural color (baby blue), yet the material is still of superior elasticity. By comparison, I can only conclude that the latex in the Big Blowup Suit must be watered down somehow, in order to reduce cost.

My biggest concern with deficient elasticity is not for failure of the latex itself, but rather the seams of the suit. I fear enough for the stability of the Chinese seam work as it is. Now, if the latex is going to give so little to pressure, that can only result in more strain applyed to the seams. During my test, the suit should not have been as tight as a drum, as it was. I've added well over 24 inches to the waistline of my first suit, and even that was still softer, despite being composed of less material.

Further evidenced "by comparison to my first suit", that my Big Blowup Suit is composed of impure, inferior latex is it's texture. The texture of my first suit, I would describe as silky smooth. Naturally shinier as well. Both layers of my Big Blowup Suit are neither as shiny or as smooth. The inner layer is the worst example. The black, interior layer of the Big Blowup Suit is very matte and exceedingly rough to the touch. Porous, I would even describe it. I could best compare it to the external texture of a tire from the weal any automobile, and takes a lot of powder to achieve a desirable smoothness. Even that the suit is loose fitting "and powdering of the interior not completely necessary for dawning", it's still not as comfortable against bear skin without it. It's probably one of the worst choices of texture I've ever seen in any piece of clothing. Though what perplexes me above all is a small, single portion of latex used in the suit's inner layer, of an entirely contrasting texture...

It exists between the legs of the suit, giving distance between the front and back of the suit. I assume it serves to give better shape to the legs. Perhaps better comfort for the wearer also. However, this single section of latex sheeting is of a conspicuously better quality than everything ells...

WHY, only this one little piece? ...Because that's the best place to put smoother material; between one's legs? Yes, I suppose but, why not the entire interior of the suit? As bizarre as this production choice is, it masterfully proves my assumption that latex does exist in both poor and proper quality. There they are, glued side by side.

Another problem which I've found with the latex is a faint, tiny blemish, located below the front right shoulder area of the suit's outer layer...

I first assumed it a mark or stain on the surface of the latex. When I pressed it between my fingers, I felt the tiniest, but distinct lump within. There appears to be a very small particle of debris, embedded within the latex. I guess it must have fallen into the sheeting during production, before the latex was vulcanized... The best I can say about this issue, is that it may never develop into a genuine problem. The foreign object appears to be completely encapsulated by the latex (even within 0.4 mm, it being so small), so theirs no breach in the material. However, if it's a grain of some hard material, with sharp edges, it could likely develop into a hole, which would later need repair. Hopefully not; the front right space between the shoulder and upper chest would be an unsightly area to patch.

The last problem I have with the material is it's thickness, though this is entirely my fault (another learning experience, which I wish to impart ). Relative to the great size of the suit, it's latex at 0.4mm thick makes for an imbalanced ratio. It feels much more flimsy on the outside than I expected, while the inside dose not hug the body as firmly as either of my previous two suits. It still feels amazing, but not as robust as I thought it would, or as I've already experienced. As it was originally intended, the Big Blowup Suit begs to be made with thicker latex; at least 0.6mm. Again, I can't blame Oz for this. I was adamant to recreating the suit from the video, and never considered that I hadn't any intention to inflate it so big.

Regarding Craftsmanship

Opposite the right eye of the hood with excess glue seepage, the left eye is scarred on it's border with several small patches of abrasion...

Similar scratches do also exist on the right eye as well. It looks as though the latex was scraped with sand paper, or grazed by some relative tool, such as a Dremel. It's fairly noticeable if the hood is powdered, as the starch accumulates in every nook and cranny. However, imperceptible if the hood is cleaned and shined. Regardless of it's severity or origin, it's still damage to the item, which I neither care nor expect to see from a popular and expensive brand. If I had to guess at it's origin though, I would say it's a byproduct of cutting out the eye holes. The holes themselves are cut very sloppy. It's not a clean "cookie cutter" perforation, but rather jagged around the edges, as though done quickly with scissors. That's some macabre craftsmanship, when the line is blurred between construction and destruction.

There are also a few surface areas across the suit where glue residue is present...

Regarding the Zippers

The zippers used on both the suit and hood are mediocre; not the best that could have been utilized. The teeth are plastic "which is wise for latex", but very small and prone to issues. It's the sort of zipper who's teeth are formed from a thin strand of plastic, spiraled and stitched into a length of sturdy fabric.

I would have preferred plastic zippers who's teeth are bigger, thicker, fewer and more distinguishable as individuals. The sort of teeth which are formed from a mold, and not an industrial sewing machine. At least for the suit alone, as such a bulky zipper would be excessive and uncomfortable on smaller garments such as the hood. Heavy zippers are more reliable and less likely to malfunction, and are already used on high end catsuits. The zippers on my Squeak suit have not failed me yet, but I would expect them to in the future. The biggest pro of the zippers is their matching the color of both items precisely. This is something I didn't have on my previous latex suit. I was not expecting it, and do commend it.

Better than the zippers are the guard flaps behind them...

That which prevent hair, undergarments, skin, and the thinner latex of the suit or hood from catching in the zippers. It also promotes comfort; preventing the teeth and coarse fabric from resting against the occupant. The latex of the flaps on both the suit and hood are significantly thicker than the rest of the material used. I do not own a micrometer, so I can't be sure, but I would estimate the thickness of the flaps to be 1.0mm, at least. Very rigid, compared to the rest of the 0.4 latex. This is another improvement over my previous latex suit, who's guard flap was the same thickness as the rest of the suit. It was too thin and would itself constantly get caught in the zipper, defeating it's own purpose.

For the placement of the zipper, on the Big Blowup Suit, as well as most other Squeak suits, I would congratulate Oz. Yet, I'm not sure if it originates from his designs. Under the legs, from ankle to ankle is "in my opinion", the absolute best place to put an entryway on an inflatable latex suit...

Besides the benefit of structural integrity, it is of equal aesthetic value. Not only the best place to hide the zipper, but also the best way to preserve the suit's intended shape. Where ever a zipper is placed, the inner and outer layers of the suit will be bound together. My old eBay suit most only expanded at it's belly because it's layers where bound by the zipper, placed along it's back. With the Big Blowup Suit, it expands out as far behind me as it dose in front of me, and properly makes me big "all over ". The beautiful shape of the suit is also undisturbed. A zipper on the back of an inflatable suit creates a "spinal recess" appearance because a large area such as the torso is inclined to puff up around the zipper as it expands. The leg entryway design takes advantage of the shape of the wearers body. Since the "pants" of the suit are designed to expand outward only, the inward zipper is pulled firmly against the wearers legs, leaving a perfect rounded surface. Finally, that the design keeps the wearers legs relatively close together is a further comfortable advantage. One does not walk "bow-legged" within the Big Blowup Suit, despite the allusion of it's appearance. The leg entry is a brilliant achievement of inflatable suit design which does not get enough recognition. I am very happy to have it on my suit.

There's one further positive aspect, which also has more to do with structural design, but dose concern the zipper. On both legs of the suit, at their base, there is a connection of fabric surrounded by latex, which prevents both sides of the zipper from ever separating...

To dawn the suit, both these "rubber loops" must be stretched in order to fit one's feet through them. While a little difficult to put on and take off, this is a good design feature, which helps to preserve the zipper. In the absence of these connections, it would be very easy to enter the one leg who's zipper is completely drawn. However, one would still find they need to fit their foot through the other leg of the suit, where both sliders still connect the teeth at it's base. Without these connections, that ankle loop would be held together by the sliders only, and nothing ells. Therefor, if one needed to stretch that ankle wider to fit their foot through, they would be pulling against the zipper itself. Consequently, one might accidentally pull the sliders loose from the teeth, and break the zipper as a consequents.

While I'm not sure if the "ankle to ankle" entryway scheme predates Oz, I have seen other examples of inflatable latex suits which employ this same system, but poorly. Similar suits from Chinese manufacturers, such as the now defunct "Queen Latex", in which the entry design was cut back or not followed correctly. Such suits do not include these protective connections on the ankles of the suit. While I have found no example or report of zippers breaking because of this, it is easy to anticipate such a problem. So, easy to perceive the use of these connections present on my suit.

Regarding the Valves

Of the "large tube inlet" (as Oz described it to me), on the left ankle, I was eager to study it in person. (I'll refer to it as the "big valve", for simplicity's sake.)

I've always been aware of it, on Oz's suits, to the point of recognizing it as unique to his brand; a signature attribute and indicator of a "Squeak Suit ". Yet I never could be sure exactly how it worked. To me, it always looked like a little rubber sock which hung from the suit but, nonetheless, always impressed me that it could be concealed inside itself for a cleaner and more pleasing presentation. Taking a closer look for myself, the workings of the big valve are actually very easy to comprehend. Like the Big Blowup Suit itself, it's a simple but genius design "which I hope Oz would not mind me describing for the sake of review".

It's composed of two parts; a long tube and a small disk. Rather than first attaching the lone tube to an opening on the suit, I imagine the big valve's instalment would be made easier by first assembling it into one complete piece. The disk is made of very thick latex; convenient for affixing the tube onto. The large latex tube passes through a slit on the disk, then the base of the tube is glued to the disk's underside. The valve hole "cut out on the suit", is then overlaid with this assembly, where it is glued in place. To the best of my deduction, this is what creates the "big valve" on Squeak suits.

The greatest benefit of the big valve is not it's large intake compacity, but that such a sizable, functional, but conspicuous extremity is retractable, and may be hidden within the suit. This is of course done by tying the tube in a knot to seal the valve, then pushing it threw the slit of the disk. Because the tube is being pushed inside itself, it is important not to tie the knot too close to it's base, near the suit. Otherwise, there will not be enough space behind the disk to fit the tube into.

Because the slit pinches the tube, airflow is usually inhibited. It has no effect on intake; any electric air pump will be powerful enough to push air through the pinch, so inflation is still as quick as such a large valve could possibly enable. Ventilation, however, is greatly obstructed. Pressure within the suit is not nearly as strong as that produced by a pump, especially if it's made of thin latex, such as mine. Consequently, air will not leave the suit through the big valve as quickly as it enters. So slow is air to pass in fact, deflation through the big valve is near imperceptible. To this effect, the big valve almost operates as a one-way valve. Now yes, this could absolutely count as a quality to some (and I would ultimately assess it so), but for someone like myself "who uses these suits alone", it's rather problematic.

Trying the suit on for the first time, it was a troubling surprise after blowing myself up, when I did not deflate immediately. The only way to deflate faster is by manual encouragement. Functioning similarly to a pool toy's valve; one may squeeze the slit to open the valve and let air out faster. Unfortunately for me, the suit is so big when fully inflated, I can't even see the valve, let alone reach it. Effectively, I was stuck inside the suit, forced to stand around waiting for about 20 minutes (hand's resting on gigantic hips and foot tapping impatiently), until deflated thin enough that I could bend myself down and reach the valve over the suit's massive belly. Not a terrible first impression, but not something I'll care to endure with every use.

I've found a way around this by inserting a short, wide piece of plastic tubing into the valve slit, to ensure proper ventilation. Again, this characteristic may count as a quality to some, but for me, it's impractical. At this time, I'm considering if I should modify the valve by removing the circular disk completely.

Of the "standard tire style valve" (Again, quoting Oz. I'll call it the "small valve".), on the right ankle, it's presence baffles me. It's use mystifies me...

It's inclusion is not a detraction, but neither a benefit. Perhaps I'm ignorant of some practical application of such a small valve on so large an inflatable, but I honestly can't imagine one. Maybe for those fellow enthusiasts who prefer a slower, more suspenseful inflation? Who revel in the process of inflating, more than simply being inflated. I'm one such people, who enjoys a thrilling inflation. That's why I prefer a two-way valve; so I can deflate quickly and do it all over again. Yet for a slower inflation, I would prefer a smaller suit (like my first). I would probably inflate it under clothing also, to hide the initial wrinkles before the suit is stretched. It would take a long time to fill the Big Blowup Suit through it's smaller valve before it's even fully inflated. I can't imagine too many inflation fans prefer to bask in such a suit while it's loose and baggy. When I think of "inflating", I think of "expanding, stretching, puffing, bloating, rounding, springy and bouncy", like a balloon. Not loose and baggy, like a wind sock. Even after the suit is tautly inflated, it's already great size would render any further inflation "at such a slow rate", ever more unperceivable, the bigger it gets.

Otherwise, it could simply be meant for additional ventilation, to compensate for the big valve's "one-way" attribute. I still can't reach it when fully inflated. Though, I could leave the cap off during inflation. By it's tiny size, the opening would not disrupt the speed of inflation through the big valve. However, the small valve is also not enough to offer any meaningful addition to the speed of deflation. Again, pressure is not that great inside the suit, so I might just be stuck inside it for 10 minuets, as opposed to 20, if I where to employ that strategy.

Where the small valve dose shine is on the inflatable hood, as it's sole point of inflation. Exactly the same as the one on the suit, the small valve is the perfect size for the smaller garment, where it's own qualities can stand out also. The screw threading between the valve and it's cap are perfectly air tight. Air flow ceases at the very moment the cap touches the valve tip. I don't know how to feel about the placement of the valve though; on the very top of the head, like Alfalfa.

It hasn't caused me any problems, but I do find it unattractive, and would prefer it more towards the back of the head in a hidden position. In fact, that was the original position, according to earlier, and current, advertisement...

There is one major, foreseeable problem with the small valves, and it concerns their composition. Both small valves, on the suit and hood, are coated and capped with a hard plastic, which is proper and harmless. However, the threaded tips of both valves look to be made of brass, or some similar coppered metal...

If you can recall, dear reader, the example I've earlier provided of my first suit, then you're already aware of the degradation brass poses to latex. Of course, there's no immediate danger. So long as the tips are capped and/or pointing away from their respective garments, so long will the latex be safe from harm. Even brief, momentary contact between brass and latex is negligible. The harmful reaction could take a day to occur, depending on the conditions. Yet, one could easily make the mistake of creating those proper conditions to ruin their gear.

Please imagine this scenario...

I'm using the suit and hood, and I'm finished doing so. I reach up, find the cap of the valve with my fingers, remove it, set it down somewhere, then let the hood deflate. What would I do next? Replace the cap? …Nope; my next instinct is to take the hood off. Commonly, a latex hood will peal off of one's head, turning it inside-out in the process of removal. Do I think to immediately turn the hood outside-out again? ...No, of course not; I wanna take my suit off next. It's tons of fun, but after a while, all that unbreathable latex, and dead air between it, can make one terribly hot and sweaty. So, I absent mindedly set the hood down somewhere, as it is...

I take the suit off, once adequately deflated. I'll re-powder it, or rinse it off and dry it first, if I have to. Cover it, hang it up, put it away. Put the pump away. Maybe go get some water, rehydrate. Take a shower, do something ells...

You see, I tend to pay less mind to the hood, because the suit takes priority. It's simply the more important item. Perhaps I have it in mind to use the hood again later "maybe as late as tomorrow", because it's so much quicker and easier to use on it's own. So, I'll leave the hood out for my convenience. I pay it no mind until then, because I think it's safe, laying on clean sheets or upholstery, atop my bed or some other piece of furniture. Meanwhile, during all this time, the hood's outer layer is surrounding the valve, coming in direct contact with the exposed brass tip, which I've completely forgotten about. If I leave that hood alone for a day, it's likely screwed. I'll turn it right side out and find little brown irreversible stains on the latex...

Substances harmful to latex should NEVER be used as part of such gear. Plain and simple.

Regarding Measurements

As previously stated, Oz solicited no such prerequisite from me whatsoever before my suit's production commenced. As also stated, I wasn't too worried "except to get on Oz's nerves for asking". I figured he would ask if it was necessary. Here are the exact common measurements of my suit's inner layer, which Oz dictated for me...

A) Overall Length......160cm / 63in

B) Torso Length...........95cm / 37in

C) Chest, Around.......160cm / 63in

D) Waist, Around...152cm / 59.5in

E) Hips, Around......156cm / 61.5in

F) Legs (Inseam)..........66cm / 26in

G) Thigh, Around......78cm / 30.5in

H) Ankle, Around........28cm / 11in

I) Shoulder Width.....70cm / 27.5in

J) Sleeve Length........81cm / 31.5in

K) Bicep, Around..........56cm / 22in

L) Cuff, Around..............20cm / 8in

M) Neck, Around...........59cm / 23in

(NOTE: I wasn't quite sure how to take the measurement for the sleeve length. Though the sleeve appears terribly short on the outside, it's base actually ends near the wearer's elbow, while the sleeves of the inner layer are a more average length. This is because the design of the Big Blowup Suit aims to make the wearer's torso a more consistent girth, from top to bottom, rather than most other inflatable suits, which put emphasis on the belly or "midriff". It achieves this by reducing the wearer's arms, in favor of enlarging their chest. Another really cool design choice on Oz's part. However, difficult to take size measurements. I could measure the inner sleeve by itself, but one has to account for the oversized "fits-all" trunk of the inner suit, which dose add to the overall length of the sleeves. To make the best record of scale, I measured the inner sleeves as would a tailor; from the middle of the back, to the cuff of the sleeve.)

As should be obvious only from the suit's internal shape, this is indeed a universal fit scheme. Dose it work?

For me, it fortunately works. I stand at 5' 9" / 174cm tall, which is within the perfect range for the suit's overall length. The trunk will fit just about anyone; maintaining almost the same constant circumference from the chest, down to the hips. Of the cuffs and ankles, I was lucky. My ankles are rather thick, at 27cm around. Though I have to stretch them a bit to pass my feet through, the ankles of the suit fit perfectly. My wrists, by contrast, are relatively small at 17.5cm around. Yet the relatively small cuffs of this suit magically fit those perfectly as well. The sleeves of the suit where not too long, which had been my biggest concern regarding the fit. They push and pull "depending on the state of the suit ", but overall fit my arms without any problem. Everything ells fits loosely, but of course, this is not a cat suit. It doesn't matter if the fit is loose on the inside when the suit inflates. In fact, I think I've already stated that an inflatable suit SHOUD fit loosely. There's really no need nor want for a tight fit on such a suit, so why make it more difficult to put on? Though I will admit, I am happy that "as opposed to my first suit ", the inner layer is smaller then the outer. Loose is preferred, but there is still such a thing as "too much".

There is one measurement though, in which my luck ran out. I'm not satisfied with the excessive circumference of the suit's collar. Obviously, this measurement was not meant to accommodate anyone's neck, but rather their head "for ease of dawning the suit, I presume". While I promote the convention of loose fitting inflatable suits "or at least, the establishment thereof", some personal specifications still must not be left to chance. The neck of the suit is such an example. It is unnecessarily wide. My neck measures 41cm around (that's giving one centimeter for comfort). At 18cm in addition, the collar nearly comes to rest on my shoulders, and so feels awkward. It's an off-putting contrast to the other four points of exit which hug my extremities perfectly. It diminishes any allusion one may wish to pretend, working as a reminder that they're only wearing a suit. Also, that the seam is not braced closer around the neck, I fear that part of the suit could be a weak spot. Not if I where over-inflating the suit on it's own "which I don't plan to do", but if I where using some sort of over garment, to convert it into a pressure suit "which I do plan to try". Though it's an Under/Over seam, it would be the only seam not brace against my body or the outer garment, and so would bear pressure it may not be able to stand.

Overall, I consider myself fortunate that the suit fits as well as it does. The singular detraction of the collar measurement, I can forgive. The measurements of the hood, however, are unforgivable. To give you an idea; my head measures 61cm / 24" around. Now see and compare that with the measurements of the hood for yourself...

A) Head Length..............33cm / 13in

B) Head, Around.........75cm / 29.5in

C) Neck Length...............9cm / 3.5in

D) Neck, Around............48cm / 19in

Like my first inflatable suit, the dimensions of the hood are exactly the same on the inside as on the outside. The hood itself is rather big —much bigger than my first— so this creates a lot of excess space inside the back of the hood, which my head tends to fall into. It practically hangs off the front of my head while uninflated...

(An inflation fetishist walks into a latex club. The bartender asks; "Why the long face?". The guest replies; "Because I got my hood from Squeak Latex.")

Naturally, the zipper is inclined to rest against the back of my head when inflated, as it reduces expansion in the back of the hood, while most expansion takes place in the frount, which pushes against one's face. This causes the eye holes to draw ever further away from the eyes as the hood is inflated, rendering visibility very narrow and poor. I have to tug on the back of the hood as I inflate it, to ensure the eye holes will stay close to my face. That I use a hand pump to inflate the hood, it's an inconvenient balancing act to get the best results (one hand tugging the hood and holding the nozzle to the valve at the same time, the other hand pumping and my feet holding the pump to the floor). Of course, this hood design is not supposed to preserve one's peripheral vision. Anyone who has ever worn a fursuit head will understand. However, it's not supposed to render one legally blind either. At worst, if I don't position the hood properly on my head beforehand, all the slack, excess latex within the hood will bulge into my eyes as it inflates, blocking my vision further, and further sabotaging my comfort and pleasure...

As the face is a more sensitive area compared to most other parts of the body, calibration is necessary to ensure one's comfort. Unlike a suit, loose universal fitting may be feasible, but is not practical for inflatable hoods. Especially for models which include eye holes; custom fitting is preferable. If I didn't want to see out of my hood, I would have chosen one so appropriate to that end.

It's not safe for the hood either, if it dose not fit the wearer's head properly. The eye holes are formed with Side by Side seams. To reiterate, the hood is too big for my head, which get's forced into it's rear, while most of the air pushes it's way into the front of the hood, pulling it's two layers further apart around the eye holes. This is another reason to encourage even air distribution, and program such into the design. If the eye holes are braced closer against my face, the hood's seams will be better preserved, AND I would see more clearly; a benefit for both. Otherwise, in the absence of proper bracing "likely proper gluing too", excess swelling will wear on those seams and eventually peal them apart.

Regarding Product Accuracy

By accuracy, I refer to the items as they appear on Squeak Latex's website, vs. the actual items received. Did I get what I wanted?

In the case of the Big Blowup Suit, I did get exactly what I wanted. It's shape matches what is advertised on the website, and the design I have been infatuated with for years. By form, I recognize it, I remember it, and I love it. Outwardly, it IS the suit I've always wanted; my dream suit has "apparently" come true... I wish I could say the same for the hood.

You've surely noticed by now, dear reader; the Inflatable Hood is not as it appears on squeaklatex.com. What appears on the site at present is the "original" design, which has featured in many of Oz's videos, posts and other publications. What I received is a design which differs considerably. Besides the valve placement, there are two significant contrasts to the original design:

1. Shape

In the original design, the back of the inflatable hood was rounded when inflated; closely conforming to the shape of the wearer's head. In the design I received, the back of the hood protrudes outward in a frankly grotesque, bulbus manor.

2. Eyes

In the original design, the eye holes of the hood are formed out of a single, goggle shaped impression on the face of the hood. As such, the eye holes also appear to feature plastic lenses. In the design I received, the eye holes are formed out of two separate circular impressions on either side of the face while the eyes feature no lenses and are instead open.

The hood featured on the website is the design I expected to get. The hood I did get is neither the one I admire or recognize from years of exposure, nor one I would have agreed to pay $320 for, had I been aware. Both alterations are a downgrade, of which I am very disappointed. The protrusion on the back of the hood is exceedingly unattractive compared to the original shape I've become accustomed to. It looks like excess material, which should have been trimmed off before the pieces where glued together. If the hood had been so cut back, it might not only have improved it's shape, but also my preestablished problems with the sizing. That bulge is where my head mostly ends up relegated to, as opposed to the front of the hood where I would prefer my face to be.

The eyes themselves are also poor by comparison. I much more prefer the original design, which I earlier described as "cute", among other things. That was mostly to do with the single small impression across it's face, which complimented the hood's overall rounded and muzzled shape perfectly. The best way I can explain my attraction to the original design is that it captured the dainty charm of a raccoon's mask, without being an actual animal hood. Take that component away, and the hood losses most of the appeal I used to favor it for. Also, the lenses, having been phased out, is obviously no improvement either. It was probably all done to cut the cost, yet the price for the same hood has only gone up over the years. I personally would have preferred to pay more for the superior design. Yet, if Oz must make alterations, then he should advertise truthfully on his website. I expect inferior design and false advertising from a $90 hood on eBay, not a $320 hood from Squeak Latex.

Worthy to note; I found, in my research, this example of the inflatable hood, which was advertised on Squeak Latex's website in 2017...

The design bears a much closer resemblance to the hood I received. The eye holes are still separate from one another, and the lenses are still absent. However, it at least appears that the eye holes here are formed with Under/Over seams, while the bulge on the back of the head is not as prominent. I might not have faulted Oz if he where still using these pictures to advertise the latest version of the hood. Instead, Oz is using the exact same photographs now as he was back in 2010...

Regarding Safety

I know this may seem redundant to some, and I mean not to bore, but safety is important, no matter what the activity. Not to sound like an H.R. rep for the community; allow me to express the reason way... I do not look forward to the day when someone, somehow, inevitably gets themself killed in an inflatable suit. Either because the wearer was reckless, the designer was careless, or a combination of both. It would be a tragic loss no matter who, and a sad, discouraging day for the community. Not to sound superfluous either, but I can also picture, and so dread the probable publicity; "Bizarre death! Brought about by this bizarre new fetish! More at 11! ". For most average people, that would be their first impression of the inflation community, and I doubt their going to smile upon it. I'd rather it remain a tranquil, untarnished, fun and safe escape to enjoy.

One needs to be careful, and it's never too soon to stop and consider what we're playing with here. Most inflatable gear restricts or restrains a wearer's dexterity, reduces or eliminates their mobility, impedes or deprives them of balance, and obstructs or blocks their field of view. It puts the wearer into a bulky, unfamiliar body who's ridiculous size alone can easily handicap. Every inflatable suit, to some degree, renders the wearer helpless. While that can be the entire appeal for some users, all should keep in mind, that is a safety hazard. Even trying my first suit "as small as it was"; I remember being very surprised. Not only at how transformed I was, but my surroundings as well. My own home suddenly became an unfamiliar place when put into a bigger, wider body which I was not used to. I had to move slowly, take care not to bump into anything.

A more dangerous example would be the larger suits which enclose one's entire body "including their head", and are easy to become trapped in. Gear such as latex sacks, or PVC mascots or wearable pool toys; that's a great way to suffocate if one's air supply is compromised. Overheating as well, which I've experienced in the PVC ball suit, on a hot summer afternoon. Yet a more likely risk for any suit (one I have come close to also), would simply be falling over. The danger can vary, depending upon the fashion of inflatable suit. If in my first suit, I likely would not lose balance so easily in the first place. If I did, I could still throw my hands out before me to break my fall. After all, I can't count on an inflatable suit to act as some sort of cushion or protective layer. Especially a flimsy latex one. That's a common misconception. In most current designs, there is nothing between the suit's exterior, and the wearer's entire body, but air. Even in the Big Blowup Suit; if I tried letting it break a forward fall for me, I would smash my face in, and maybe crack some ribs too. (Remember; no trust falls with a Squeak suit.)

Now, if it where my second suit, "the PVC ball suit", I'd be in deep shit. I've already said, that thing is a death trap, and it's no wonder to figure out why. It's bottom is pushing against the floor, between my feet, when fully inflated. The suit is already aching to topple me, and when it does, I'm stuck for the ride. My arms are trapped inside the suit, my hands are stuck out to the sides, so rendered useless. The PVC does not burst or flatten out against the floor, even under the weight of my body, and it proceeds to role forward. The suit maintains it's rounded shape and swiftly rolls upside-down while my head attracts to the floor like a magnet because, unfortunately, humans are top-heavy. It doesn't matter how much I payed for it; I'll have wished that suit had popped on me. I suffer a concussion, or a broken neck, and there you would have in me our first victim to inflatable suits.

I use myself as the morbid example because, much to my guilt, I have already admitted above to unsafe practice. I always use my suits alone. Of course, it has been fairly recommended, by several suit makers "including Oz himself", as well as fellow users of even greater experience, to never use inflatable suits alone... It has also been recommended to chew each bite of food no less than 100 times before swallowing. I would argue; not all recommendations are practical, and certainly not convenient. Even if I wasn't so shy about this hobby, I still would not enjoy having to call a friend over, every time I want to get big and round. I wanna do it whenever the Hell I damn well please! If I wanna wake up at 3 in the morning, impersonate a puffer fish, then go back to sleep, I shouldn't have to run across the street and rip my neighbor out of bed to make it happen.

I think, for that reason, most people are not inclined to suit "by the book". Too much care takes the fun out of it. While one should not be afraid to enjoy their gear, it is still their responsibility to never underestimate it. The "never suit alone" rule, I regard more as a guide line than an empirical rule. Like "drinking 8 cups of water a day"; everyone has different requirements. Everyone has different suits too. Those who use them should be able to exercise proper judgment for their own safety. If it's a smaller suit "like my first", that's really not a danger which behooves supervision. If it is, then furries should never be permitted to wear their fursuits alone, without a handler (good luck with that). If it's a ball suit, then one would be foolish not to have a partner standing by. They should at least wear a crash helmet. I'm not even joking. If one intends to suit alone, but has not yet settled on a selection, they would be wise "if not, disciplined", to choose an appropriate suit for that circumstance; something lighter, and more forgiving than a ball suit. That's another reason I much prefer latex over PVC. In fact, it's also an important reason why I desired the Big Blowup Suit.

How safe is the Big Blowup Suit?

The Big Blowup Suit is a very user friendly design. It's as big as a suit can be, before compromising a wearer's movements. Dexterity is almost fully preserved. Though the arms are partially consumed by the suit, it does not obstruct their movement, except from underneath. One also retains full use of their hands, as the Big Blowup Suit does not include gloves or "mittens", as do the inflatable fursuits in Squeak Latex's selection. Likewise, one doesn't have to wear a hood with the Big Blowup Suit either. They can have full visibility of their surroundings, safe the floor at their feet. It's still important to watch one's step, or prepare a clear area for such a suit.

Mobility, amazingly, is also greatly preserved. Despite the size, one could move very quickly in the Big Blowup Suit, if they wanted. Though, one really shouldn't move too fast in such a big suit, but they can if they want. Oddly enough, the suit "to me", is more difficult to move around in while uninflated. Obviously, this is "by anyone's standard", not a cat suit. It's a completely different experience when uninflated. I could best describe it as a "rubber toga"; a lot of loose, heavy, hanging material draped around the body, which is no less detracting to one's mobility. The zipper is greatly apparent between the legs when uninflated, which induces slower movement "and a bit of a waddle". It's more easy to trip on the latex, especially if taking ascending or descending steps. Also while deflated, the loose folds of latex are much more apt to catch on sharp corners than merely brush against them, as if inflated.

For these reasons, I would recommend staying put after dawning the suit. Put it on where you plan to inflate, then immediately do so if you intend to move around. In any case; take it slow and steady. I know these too are only "recommendations", but hopefully more convenient to follow, if one must suit alone. Inflatable suiting should be a convenient, casual activity, and to that end, the Big Blowup Suit is perfectly qualified. Still, one should never be too confident. No matter how safe it is, or nimble the wearer, an inflatable suit will always physically reduced them to something less than they are. Ultimately, we are trading our own control for pleasure.

Overall, I would deem the Big Blowup Suit a very safe design and option. As such, it would make a great first suit for beginners, who are unexperienced. A good "practice" or "training suit ", if you will. After all, I wanted it from the beginning because it obviously offered great control in addition to great size, and control equals safety. That makes it a great option also for solo suiters, like myself. It's furthermore a great universal choice for anyone who is unsure what their first inflatable suit should be, or those who are not sure of inflatable suits in general, but wish to try. In terms of size, it's right in the middle of the spectrum. I think it would satisfy anyone who is unsure what size they are most comfortable with, until they do know for sure, and adjust to what may better suit them, if not the Big Blowup Suit.

As a design which is not likely to promote injure or endanger a responsible wearer, and a single outward size which should satisfy most preference, I would encourage all first time (undecided) buyers to make the Big Blowup Suit their first inflatable suit. No matter what, one can't really go wrong with the Big Blowup Suit. It give so much, yet asks for so little in return... I think I've already said so, but if I where to personify the Big Blowup Suit, I would describe them as a fun, gentle and generous person. Big'n clumsy, yes but, still well-meaning.

All joking aside, every inflatable suit is still only an inanimate object, which can, and does not care if it hurts us. It is always important to be careful in every suit. Inflatable suits are a fun and new, but unexplored and unregulated venture, with obvious and predictable risks. As far as I know, no one has been seriously hurt, and precaution seems redundant. Yet it's typically only after tragedy strikes that we decide to put lifeboats on ships, seatbelts in cars, emergency exits on buildings and security measures in airports. Thankfully, there are some inflatable suit makers now who are preemptively developing safety measures for the heavier, more dangerous suits, and deserve great praise for it. Though there are still others, *cough, China*, who care as much about safety as they do quality. So one should be careful, even when making a selection. No matter what the suit, never underestimate the consequences of careless use, or careless design.

Always have fun, dear reader, but please, ALWAYS be careful too. Do not be the first.

May there never be a first.

Regarding Functionality

There is one further problem with the hood. It has an unusual flaw, in which the latex used to line and color the breathing tube is not glued down within the tubing itself. Somehow, when the hood is inflated, air pushes it's way in between the latex lining and inner side of the plastic tubing, causing the airway to swell up and block itself...

While airflow through this swollen passageway is nearly impossible, I will admit, the hood dose not form a proper seal around the nose, so breathing through the eye holes is possible. However, that dose not excuse nor fix the problem. That the hood dose not embrace the wearer's head properly is it's own undesirable problem. Meanwhile, it's not fair that I still have to take the tube in my mouth, for no practical reason. The tube is not comfortable if left out of the mouth; pressed against my lips. Yet after a while, it's neither comfortable to keep one's lips pressed around it, or one's jaw closed on it. This design forces me to keep the tube in my mouth. If I must, I at least demand a reason, that the discomfort serve some purpose. This hood is proving more trouble than it's worth (far more than it costs), and utterly vanquishes it's own point of positive sensation.

You'd probably think it, dear reader, nice to wear, despite all the flaws. Even someone who is not partial to this sort of interest; I imagine if I showed them this same hood "all puffed up", that person (among their immediate judgments), no matter how priggish, would at least admit to themselves that it must feel awfully comfortable to wear... but no. It feels janky and awkward because of the loose, oversized fit. It induces strain to try and see out of it, and now this last problem genuinely gives me regret having ever ordered it. That's one too many flaws for me to be happy with this item. It's not easy to dissatisfy me, considering my last two suits. After all, my first hood was literally unwearable. The best I can say about this hood, is that it does look better than my first, and I can put it on, but that's hardly a selling point. I could put on a barbed cilice chain too. Just because it fits dose not mean it's going to be comfortable. Perhaps I'm most dissatisfied because I can remember feeling assured by this comment, years prior...

...Yes, it is.

I've purchased from both establishments, and after all shortcomings considered, I can say today, with authority, that my hood from Squeak Latex is eBay quality. I can not believe Oz would ship an item out to a client in this condition. There's no way he didn't notice this flaw. That's not speculation; it's a matter of fact. If you take a closer look at the progress photo Oz sent me, days before it arrived, you can see that the flaw was already present in the breath tube while he was modeling the hood for me...

He knew, and he shipped it anyway... Honestly? He couldn't be bothered to fix this? I don't know how to fix it. Perhaps it's possible to learn, but I payed top dollar so I would not again have to worry about such a thing. Where is the quality control he boasted in the same comment above? I know he's not using the same production team from a decade ago, so quality of production may differ now from what it was, but to ignore a flaw this bad is on Oz. It's completely his fault that the hood arrived in this condition, which is unacceptable and, frankly, disgraceful.

Oz dare not accuse me of using his own products against him; it's the products themselves which now betray him. Products which, quite literally, bear his own seal of approval...